This week - still not improving

I'm not improving. But then again, I haven't rested well. I wanted to, but with the bathroom remodel comes certain obligations, unless I want to spend even more money, and it's already stupid expensive. I took Sunday & Monday as rest days, but I had to paint on Monday & Tuesday (Tuesday was a holiday here, and I'd arranged for the long weekend). I didn't want to, but that was how the timing went with the remodel. I did have some help from Kathryn (church friend) and Calvin, thank goodness, but even with that it was VERY taxing. It's not a small room, and I had to do the ceiling, and I wanted to do a really, really good job since the rest of the room will be a high end remodel thanks to my amazing contractor Jesse. I got it done, but at the cost of my health I'm afraid.

Add in the 10K "race" I was registered for that I did on Tuesday (the Deseret News 10K, which I usually LOVE to do), walking casually with Calvin, and racewalking just 3K (time 1:22), and that put me over the edge. I was really just dead on my feet. 

I went back to work on Wednesday and felt terrible. Definitely no exercising. I intended to just work a few hours and take some sick time, because of how I felt, but I ended up staying for my usual ~7 hours. Same on Thursday, though I felt a bit less terrible and did 20 min elliptical before work. On Friday I actually felt better, and did 30 min elliptical before work.

On Friday I also had an appointment with the hematologist to see what he thought about my anemia. Remember, I have mild anemia with a hemoglobin of 12.3 and hematocrit of 37.5. Normal for women is 13 and 39, minimum. I have a history of at least 7 years of mild anemia and my family doc thought I should get it worked up with my continuing fatigue and my desire to racewalk competitively. Add in a low white count and mild neutropenia (low # of neutrophils, which help fight infection) and it was cause to get a referral. The hematologist was excellent (and in fact, knows my boss in a roundabout manner), and we hit it off well. He looked me over carefully, took a thorough history, and had good news and bad news. The good news is that I don't have a major hematologic disorder (like, say, blood cancer). The bad news is that I have what they call "anemia of chronic disease", which means that my anemia is merely symptomatic of some other disease process, likely chronic inflammation of some type or some autoimmune disorder. Since I've been to rheumatology (the autoimmune specialists) and they didn't find anything, this is more perplexing. There is something wrong, but no one knows what it is. He suggested an immunologist, perhaps, but the direction is a bit unclear from here. I am definitely going to go back to my family medicine doc and sports medicine doc and see if they have further advice.

Meanwhile, something is very, very wrong, and I have no idea what or how to feel better. It's bad enough now that it is affecting my work and personal life, which is worse than just affecting racewalking. It's bad enough that social media is painful because then I see all my racewalker friends' accomplishments and feel worse. On the bright side, I seem to be over the worst of it as far as my antidepressant withdrawal. I'm still pretty emotional, but the nausea, dizziness, headaches, and brain zaps are gone. Still, it will take my body a while to make more serotonin, and I'm likely to feel fairly lousy for a bit because of that, which is definitely not helping things. I'll get through this, but it's not fun.

dragging

Dragging today.

Last night: brain zaps (minor, but annoying), fatigue, diarrhea. Up at 2am feeling very ill, and was awake for ~2hr stressing about various things including the finances for the bathroom remodel (which turns out to be mostly fine now that I've run and re-run the #s, though it's gonna be close...) and the tile choices and other things. Finally went back to sleep.

Got in to work and realized I'd messed up something and will have to work late today and a bunch on the weekend to fix it. Sometimes I really hate research. Actually, it's more that I hate my own stupidity.

Feel dizzy and ill but am trying not to take any more escitalopram. Want to be done with it.

I did 20 min on the elliptical hoping it would make me feel better. It didn't make me feel worse.

It must be Friday the 13th.

Back to work insanity now.

Week 2. Never Give Up.

I'm still here - game face at left needed for this week. It's been a completely insane week at work (summer, lots of new people in lab, people who can help new people on vacation, etc) and at church (search committee stuff wrapping up but lots of details) and at home (house guest) and with family (dad still sick though much better) and the usual amount of kid drama/kid stuff (violin lessons, soccer meetings & registration for new team, the missed piano lesson due to busyness).

Now I know these are minor things in the big picture - but it's just been a lot of, well, stuff. Too much stuff = stress and anxiety. I need a personal life declutterer. Haha. But just saying that makes me realize that I am my own personal life declutterer, and I've been neglecting simplification. Sometimes you can't simplify, and this may be one of those times, but I need to try. A practical step is probably going to involve scheduling in some "me" time on my calendar. Not sure where, but it's going in.

All that to say that though I overslept on Thursday and had to postpone a workout to Friday, I still did all of my workouts. HA!

Sunday: rest
Monday: 6K at 6:50/km (slow but done)
Tuesday: 4K  at 6:39/km (indoor track - pouring rain and I was wimpy), plus 3x200 @85% (which I did at more like 100% because I was in a mood!) in 1:01, 1:02, 1:00
Wednesday: elliptical - 30 min (at the gym)
Thursday: overslept
Friday: warm-up (10:45 for 4 laps - slow), 3K fartlek in 19:23 (slow and heavy legs but DONE anyway)
Saturday: 12K at 6:54/km - hilly route! Calvin and dogs did 6K with me.

I'm in need of more speed but otherwise I'm doing OK. My legs felt fine when I was done with 12K again so at least the endurance is better than last week, when the last 3km of 10km was not optimal, leg-wise.


My eating wasn't great but it wasn't terrible either. I did lose 2 lb. Home scale says 166.0, WW scale 167.2 (down 2.2 at WW). Keeping on track enough. For this week, am going to do better at menu planning and scheduling me time. I'm on it right now.

resuming training

I took a week off racewalking after the SLC Half, because my coach let me :). That was good - I think I needed it.

I *did* do some weight training (2 days) including glute and hammy exercises (walking lunges, nordic hammys, bridges) and core stuff (planks mostly), and some arm stuff (lateral raises, bench press with dumbbells). That made me a bit sore but it was fine (!) yay! Happy about that since I had to give up weight training because of my weird muscle pain a few years ago and have been a bit afraid to resume. But it's good now! So far. I also did a lot of elliptical and a lot of casual walking. No racewalking.

And I've been watching my diet more, though it's still not quite where it needs to be; still, in a couple weeks I lost 4.5lb of the 6lb I gained. So that's something.

Yesterday I resumed training. I did 6K and was supposed to do 5x200m @85% effort, but I did 3x200m at a hard effort (in 3:16; getting a little faster), and on the last one a nagging pull I've had (minor - very minor) in my lower left abs became a bit more nagging, so I stopped. I think it's fine, but will keep an eye on it. It bothered me a teensy bit when starting my 8K today. My 6K time was 39:27 for 6:34/km and I forgot my HR monitor (oops). Yesterday's weather was great - 10C (50F) and sunny and calm. Nice.

Today I did 8K in a light rain, and same temp 10C (50F). It was actually pretty nice out despite the light rain, which was refreshing. Plus my legs felt really good! I did the 8K in 51:48 for 6:29/km with ave HR 149. I'm starting to get back on track. Now to stay healthy.

I've been too busy (still) but I think the worst busyness of the pulpit committee may be over soon - we are moving deeper with some candidates so that requires less initial screening in large #s. Whew. That will help. But I need to get a bit more sleep, which will help with the weight loss too. All in good time. Trying to be patient with myself as I work through each day, and trying to tuck in some rest/relaxation points during the day.

Cross-training tomorrow!

elliptical; 3K fartlek

Tulips from this morning, at left. So beautiful around our neighborhood!

Yesterday: elliptical for 30 min, plus walking a lot around campus (errands).

Today: 3K fartlek. I woke up feeling really good, for the first time in a while. It wasn't that I got that much sleep, because I didn't (7 hr?), but I guess I slept well? I did have a very relaxing evening with our small group from church, and some good conversation with Loren before bed; Calvin drove me a bit crazy with piano practicing issues, but otherwise things were peaceful. I can't say why I felt good, but I did. Go figure.

I was actually kind of excited to go to the track. It was 8.9C (48F) which is pretty average or slightly warmer than usual for this time of year in the morning, and I wore capris and a long sleeved shirt but forgot my gloves. That was OK, though as it was borderline whether I needed them. It was a bit breezy so I was chilled to start but then after the warm-up was fine.

My warm-up was a lot faster than the last 2 weeks for the same thing - 10:09 this week vs 10:33 and 10:34 for the last 2 weeks. I felt good. The workout followed and was good - I was happy because all my fast 500s were back under 3 min, where they belong :). My medium 500s are still slowish but that's fitness and it will return.

Garmin data here. 

Splits	Time	Cumulative Time	Avg HR	Max HR
1	02:57.2	02:57.2	149	157
2	02:59.8	05:57.0	161	164
3	03:13.4	09:10.4	158	164
4	02:59.9	12:10	164	167
5	03:17.7	15:28	160	167
6	02:59.2	18:27	165	169
Summary	18:27	18:27	159	169

elliptical; 6K w/3x200 @85%

Yesterday: elliptical, but only for 25 minutes...I was tired, and busy. Something is better than nothing though!

Today: Had a bit of trouble getting out of bed so I was running late. I managed my 6K with my dog Sugar just fine; my legs were a little tired when I got out of bed but felt fine on my walk :). Did 6:39/km for 39:55 with ave HR 144. Then rushed home to walk Calvin to school - I like the hangout time with him; he can walk himself but it's good to spend the time with him. On the way back, with my dog Powder, I did some 200s - but only had time/distance for 3 before getting to our street. As it was I still missed my regular bus and took a little later one. The 200s were slow but I expected that. Whatever. I'm training.

***

It's hard to train right and eat right at the same time. It takes energy to train, and takes energy (quite a lot actually) to eat right. I am trying to sleep more, but that's tricky too, as I'm serving on the search committee at our church to find a new pastor (our previous pastor had a great job opportunity open up in New York City, and after 16 years here we miss him but it was good for him to take the opportunity). The search committee is a lot of work, but I'm glad I'm doing it. Add in the usual kid stuff and work stuff and it gets a little crazy - no, a LOT crazy. I'm learning to say no to other things to make all this work, but I don't want to stay this busy all the time and am glad this is just for a season. Meanwhile, it's challenging.

elliptical; 3K fartlek

Yesterday: elliptical for 45 min. I felt very, very tired yesterday and after 30 min I thought about stopping, and maybe I should have, but I thought, "It's just the elliptical...I only have 15 more minutes". I ended up taking a nap for ~25 min when I got home from work, which helped. I'll have to keep an eye on this.

Today: 3K fartlek. I am a little sore from something - but just a little (very minor), all over - shoulders, arms, abs, legs. Otherwise, feeling good, and the weather was amazing this morning at 16C (61F), calm, and clear. I did a warm-up with strides, and it felt OK. Not great, not bad, but OK. Then I did some dynamic stretching and started my workout. After the first 1km (kinda slowish, even a little slower than last week) I felt pretty tired and had no gas in the tank. Legs were heavy and not moving well, but I felt good mentally, telling myself "no judgment" and "relax" which helped. I finished about 14 sec slower than last week but that seems fine given how I was feeling. I worked hard and got a good workout in, which is what matters at this point.

After the workout I felt great, and I feel pretty good now too. Hoping the tired thing isn't a trend. I have been thinking that if I can train again and lose some weight that I really want to try to go to Spain in Sept 2018 for World Masters. My family wants to go to Spain (kids are in Spanish immersion) too, so it would be a win-win. Now to stay healthy and uninjured. Haha.

Splits	Time	Cumulative Time	Avg HR	Max HR
1	03:00.1	03:00.1	145	157
2	03:03.9	06:04.0	158	161
3	03:20.4	09:24.4	154	161
4	03:04.1	12:29	160	163
5	03:22.6	15:51	156	163
6	03:03.8	18:55	161	166
Summary	18:55	18:55	155	166

Garmin data here. 

18K at the Oval

Yesterday: ~35 min elliptical, plus did some hiking at Red Butte Garden (~30 min) very, very easy with a friend (she's in her mid-60s and a little frail for her age). 

Today: 18K on tap, and with it raining (hard) and 40F (4C), I opted for the indoor comfort of the Olympic Oval. It was odd today as there was no ice (!) just concrete where the 400m speed skating track usually is; I guess they have to redo the ice occasionally. So, no long track speed skaters to watch, though there were a few short track skaters on the two hockey rinks in the center of the oval. The track is 442m and so for me 6:30-6:45/km would be about 2:53-2:59 per lap. I was hoping to stay in that range, and I did overall, though there were a number of slower laps. Sigh. My legs were kind of tired by 10k, but not terrible; still, I wasn't feeling strong today. I also didn't feel awful, so I will take it :). No GI distress at all, which is great. Last week after my 16K I had problems, and also had some trouble after the 14K the week before, so no trouble is good news. 

I was slow, getting to 5K about 33 min and change, 10K about 1:06 and change, 15K in 1:40:40 or so, and 18K in 2:01:17. My pace overall was 6:44/km, which is a lot slower than I'd like to be, but my HR was mostly in the low to mid 150s (average was 149, but that reflects short stops for gel/water 4 times during the workout, I think) and I felt I was pushing the pace a little. The reality is that after not training for a long time, and increasing in age, I'm not going to be fast. But I'm glad I could train and prep some more for the half marathon in a few weeks. It will be slow, but at least I can do it, which is the main thing. 

Garmin data here.

elliptical, 3K fartlek

Yesterday: 45 min elliptical, in a 25-min session and a 20-min session (interrupted by walking the kids to school). I bought a cheap, used elliptical for home, and it's been great. The ones at the gym are a lot better but sometimes convenience is very important as to getting in a workout or not getting in a workout!

Today: 3K fartlek. Gorgeous weather at the track. Calm and clear, and not too cold at 8.9C (48F). Just right. I had a bunch of negative thoughts, but successfully pushed them aside both before and during the workout. I told myself there was no judgment and that I was just out here to have a good hard workout. That helped, and I got it done.

Did 1600m warm-up with strides in 10:44, and my legs felt sluggish. I got a little concerned about that but they are fine now (lunch time) and as long as the fatigue stays away we're good.

The fartlek went about how you'd expect at this point, given that I haven't done one since December. Splits are below. I'd complain that I'm slow, but actually given my fitness (not much!) this seems fine. It's somewhere to start and I'm proud of the effort.



-->

Splits	Time	Avg HR	Max HR
1	02:58.8	149	156
2	03:04.7	158	161
3	03:15.8	156	161
4	03:03.1	161	164
5	03:17.6	158	163
6	03:01.3	163	167
Summary	18:41	157	167

Garmin data here.

And, you can't beat the view from the track.

Emigration Canyon 10-miler (16K), 6K

Busy week (as usual lately - too busy - am working to change this). Not proud of it and hoping things will calm down a bit.

Saturday I did the Emigration Canyon 10 mile race (16K) and enjoyed it a lot despite being slow and getting quite sore because of the large amount of downhill. It was uphill for 2k and then downhill for 13K and then more or less flattish for 1K. Tough course but so pretty. I finished in 1:46:01 for 6:33 per km (my watch said 16.2km), which is slow for that much downhill, but I don't care right now. Just glad I did it. That afternoon I worked very hard in the yard for 3 hr, getting rid of major weed problems. Yay spring :) for flowers but :( for weed eradication and the resumption of yard work. I'm not a fan.

Sunday I cross-trained 45 min on the elliptical followed by a soak in the hot tub at the gym to ease my muscles and help me relax. It felt great.

My muscles were still quite sore today and it really hurt to start racewalking but once I'd done about 500m it felt better, and though I was slow again, at least it got done. 6K in 40:22 for 6:44/km with ave HR 143. Yeah...slow...oh well. I'm heavy and out of shape, but hey, I got out there and got it done.

Now if I can just sleep enough to keep the fatigue at bay and help with weight management. I'm still attending my Weight Watchers meetings and am down over 7lb since January but still have a ways to go.

One of the things that's keeping me really busy is that I'm on the pulpit committee at church, helping us find a new pastor (our previous pastor got a great new job at a large church in New York City; we miss him). It's a ton of work and lots of meetings, but actually has been interesting and fun.

OK...got to run...lots to do :). Including SLEEP hopefully.

14K and other stuff

What I've been up to:

Wednesday: elliptical 45 min.

Thursday: 8K on the indoor track at the U at approximately 6:30-6:40/km pace. Forgot my Garmin and had a few other mishaps so not 100% sure of my time.

Friday: elliptical 45 min plus lots of walking around campus. Got almost 25,000 steps.

Today: 14K. Took Sugar with me and had a great time, though I was slowish. To be fair, I did a fairly hilly first 8km, and my legs were a bit tired from the 25000 steps yesterday, so I think it's all good. I'm just happy to have gotten it done. If I recover well, speed will come later, when I get more fit and can do speed work. For now to finish and to feel good w/o excessive fatigue is a good goal.

I beat the rain :). It was clear and upper 40s F (9C) with 10mph (16kph) breeze, and quite pleasant for a spring morning.

1:35:02 for 6:47/km. 

Canyonlands 5-miler; feeling better

I've been feeling better since mid-February or so, which is great. I've been trying to get more sleep, but other than that I'm not sure what the difference is. It seems kind of random, as it has for the past 4 years, so I guess I'm just happy to be feeling better.

On Saturday (the 18th) I did the Canyonlands 5-miler. I was originally registered for the half marathon, but after the 2 weeks of fatigue in January I had to drop to the 5-miler. I was a bit bummed about that, but glad I could at least still do something. Calvin was slated for the 5-miler as was my friend Diane, so that worked well; plus, the weather was crazy warm on Saturday and the people doing the half really suffered at the end, so I guess it all worked out for the best.

I have actually been able to ramp up my long day just a little the past few weeks, from 8km to 10km, and so I decided to do 12km on race day. I did 2km out and back before the race started, and had the whole road to myself, which was absolutely stunning (at left). I got back just about 1min before the gun went off (perfect timing!) and then did the 8km of the race. My total time worked out to 6:36/km for the 12km, which was great considering how out of shape I am and also the hills and the warmth of the day, which I'm not used to yet.

Calvin and Diane had very good races and placed well in their age groups, I got Loren a couple beers at the finish line beer garden, and Grace enjoyed playing on the playground in the park, so we all had a great time. Plus add in some great food, swimming/hot tub at the hotel, and some amazing hikes (Saturday: Tower Arch; Sunday: Delicate Arch) and it was a great weekend. The only downer was the crazy 4WD road in Arches that totally tore up our car (eeek!); it was designed for high clearance vehicles but there was no sign advertising this and so we were in over our heads in our Rav4. Fortunately Loren was quite skillful so we didn't get stuck or roll the car (both very real possibilities on this crazy road) and the only damage was to our muffler. We got it fixed today for $182 so that could've been a lot worse.

More pics:

Delicate Arch

Pasta Jay's (Calvin's fave!)

***

Monday I did some elliptical to let my body recover.

Today I went out for a gentle 6K and my legs were still a little sore from the hiking, etc. so I wasn't surprised to be a bit slow at 6:48/km. But it felt fine and I plan on 8K on Thursday and 14K on Saturday. Fingers crossed to keep feeling good as I have a race registration for the Salt Lake Half in April and I can do it if things keep going all right.

Off to bed - I have been finding that extra sleep is very helpful with the fatigue thing.

follow-up since St. George trip

After I got back from St. George, which was SO restful, it took about 2-3 days for me to totally crash and burn. The fatigue hit me like a ton of bricks, and I have absolutely no idea why. I didn't overload my schedule when I returned, so...? Thankfully it was only bad for about a week, and I think maybe now I'm starting to feel better?

I've done a lot of elliptical lately, since I bought a used one for my house :), and the weather has been cold and nasty with a lot of snow. Plus I'm trying to take it easy on my body, with the fatigue and all.

So....the upshot is that today was the first day I racewalked since going to St. George, and it felt like it :(. I did 5K in 33:15, with some rolling hills (~20m), which isn't bad, but I was breathing SO hard, and my HR was up in the 160s. Sigh...all fitness gone. But at least I got to walk.

In other news, I went back to my Weight Watchers meeting on Saturday, after not going for 8 months. Yup, it was ugly. I had gained 15lb and am up to 174.0. Dang it. Well, what can I expect? I'm a recovering food addict and I have got to stay on track. So I'm back, and have work to do. I reset my goal weight to 160lb because I'm not walking competitively right now and that's a more realistic # given my fatigue. Back on the wagon - and I'm feeling great about tracking and monitoring food intake again :).

elliptical; 8K

I feel great. This weekend away has been very rejuvenating. I'm sure by the time I'm back home for a couple days I'll be tired again, but for now, it's good. I have to address that tired at home part - have been discussing strategies with Loren so that I don't get so worn out. I'm not good at asking for help, and that's a goal for the next month or two so that I can get through the daily routine more easily.

Exercise-wise, I did the elliptical yesterday for an hour, and otherwise relaxed, read a LOT of books (I think I've read 6 books this weekend!), watched football with Loren, and colored in the adult coloring book my sister-in-law got me for Christmas.

Today, I did 8km. My shins were sore (very sore! haha!) from the 10km on Saturday, but I knew it would still feel good to get out. Obviously I haven't been walking enough (though in part the shin soreness was from the hills). The rest of me was a bit sore too - core, mostly, but even my arms were a little sore. Geez. On the plus side, it tells you what a great total-body workout racewalking is. As for the 8km, it went quite well. I picked a much flatter route through neighborhoods, which wasn't as interesting as yesterday's route but was gently rolling, a lot like my typical workout at home. Still, it is very pretty here with the red rock and snowy mountains behind it, so it's not like it was boring. My legs (except shins haha!) felt good for about 6km and then were a bit tired the last 2km, but not too bad.

I'm enjoying the thaw-out from the cold and inversion (bad air) in Salt Lake. It was chilly for St. George this morning at 33F (1C) but the high temp predicted for Salt Lake is 30 today, so obviously I'm liking the weather here. I wasn't cold at all with long-sleeve, tights, and gloves, and the gorgeous sun felt amazing. In fact, I took off the gloves near the end of the workout; I'm sure it warmed up some while I was out.

My speed was about what you'd expect right now at 6:45/km. I'll take it. Average HR was 141. Here's the fitbit data. I forgot my Garmin, remember? :)

attempting to get back in action

It's been a month (!) since I've posted, but I really have been trying to get back in action. That was only slightly derailed by holiday company and planning, as I got exercise pretty much daily, whether 5-6km racewalking, or 30-45 min elliptical, or cross-country skiing (yay! fun!).

More problematic was the first week of January, when I 1) got a severe stomach flu, and 2) 2 days later had my tooth implant installed (previously scheduled). That did set me back a bit. But last week I felt like I was able to ease back into things, and better yet, I'm now in St. George for the weekend for some MUCH needed R&R with Loren and without the kids (left our housemate Kenzie to watch house and dogs, and my parents are watching the kids). It's excellent. I think we are going to have to do this more often. Not that I don't love my kids, but they are a lot of work, and every mom needs a break sometimes.

So yesterday I did an hour (! the luxury! to have an hour!) on the elliptical and then this morning I decided that since that had felt pretty good I'd try 10km racewalking. The 10km went pretty well, though I tracked it in two separate instances on my Fitbit because 1) I forgot my Garmin (grrr!) and 2) I misread the Fitbit and thought I was at 10km when really I'd just taken 10000 steps on my walk, which was 9.16km. So then I had to do an extra 0.84km to get the 10km, but I was motivated. I really wanted that 10km under my belt.

Keep in mind that it was VERY hilly (there's nowhere flat that's convenient here), and that I'm *very* out of shape and about 15 lb over racing weight. Therefore, I was super slow. But it's something, and I'm out there again.

Total time was 1:03:20 + 6:15 for 1:09:35 (6:58/km). Wow, that's so slow. ***MUST NOT GET DEPRESSED*** yelling to myself. ***YOU GOT OUT THERE AND THAT'S WHAT MATTERS***. [end of rant]. My average HR was pretty low - the first 9.16km it was 134 according to my Fitbit, but that HR monitor is NOT as accurate as my Garmin chest strap, and that seems low for how I felt.

My legs felt good for 7km, then quite tired the last 3km, which is totally reasonable for how little I've RW lately. My left foot was a bit sore at the end of the walk, on the lateral side. Will keep an eye on that.

Here's a photo. I really did enjoy myself :). And the weather is SO much better here than in Salt Lake! It was 45F (7.2C) and overcast with an occasional slight drizzle, but that is really nice in my book --- my last walk in SLC was so icy that I was terrified. It's been as cold as 2F (-17C) at our house, so 45 feels delightful.

doing what I can

Wednesday: 30 min elliptical wore me out. 

Thursday: went to the track, did 1 mile with strides in a ridiculously slow 10:45, felt lousy (weak, dizzy, fatigued, heavy legs) and went home sad :(. 

Friday & Saturday: rested from exercise (still went to work, cared for kids, house, etc). 

Today: I'm still kinda weak and dizzy with heavy legs, but going stir crazy. Went out and did 6K alternating 500m walk/RW and it felt OK (only 5K on Garmin, long story). Still dizzy, and tired at the end, but it was a gorgeous morning 62F and sunny and I enjoyed it a lot. The dogs did too :). They've been a bit crazy not exercising (no one else takes them out!). 

Someday I'll feel better. Until then, trying to keep my spirits up, eat right (!have gained so much weight! UGH!) and get exercise as I'm able. 

Soul searching

Saturday, after the PT on Friday, my hammy really hurt. A lot. Like 2-3, maybe 4 at times, while racewalking 8k on the Jordan River Parkway. Ugh. It was terrible. I wanted to do 20K, then realized it was gonna be 10-12K, then had to stop at 8K.

Sunday night I picked up the pianist (and his mom, and two teachers) that we are hosting for the Gina Bachauer Junior Competition this week. Things got busier from there. I did take a rest day on Sunday, but it was busy getting ready for our guests.

Monday morning I went out for 6K, and it felt OK. But I was slow, and tired. Every time I pull my hamstring it shortens up my stride because I get paranoid about hurting it, and then I lose my toe-off, and then I'm really slow. I did 6:37/km. Oh yay.

Tuesday I was supposed to do 8K, but I was up late Monday night for the piano competition opening gala, and I was way too tired to get up and walk. So I didn't. I was angry about the hammy and frustrated and tired.

Wednesday I did the 8K, and it went OK; better than Monday but still sluggish. I did 6:32/km. I was talking with friends Wednesday night and journaling some and realizing that something has to give in my life. I'm too busy and it's not good for me or the kids or Loren or work or RW or anything else. But I don't know what to give up.

Today I was to do a 5K fartlek. I woke up tired with a sore throat and just looked in the mirror and said "I don't have to do this any more. Maybe I need to give competitive racewalking a rest." So I went to the gym and did the elliptical and did my PT - including all of the eccentric exercises. It felt OK during, but later, at work, my hammy hurt annoyingly any time I sat more than 15 minutes.

So, right now I'm thinking that I need to consider carefully whether I need a break or not. I'm thinking a break might help my hamstring to recover, though when I e-mailed my PT about that he said he thought I could continue training, albeit at a reduced volume.

I just don't know what to do.

But hey, at the moment I'm enjoying a Chopin Etude, courtesy of my 13-year-old guest prodigy. That's awesome at least.

5x878m at indoor track

Yesterday: Cross training; elliptical + PT.

Today: Went to the indoor track since the outdoor one is closed for resurfacing. I warmed up for 5 laps (~1500m) and felt horridly sluggish to start and was concerned; also felt a bit nauseated, but that subsided. By the 3rd lap I felt a bit better and was good to go.

I started in on the intervals, and felt OK. I focused a lot on technique, thinking about all that my coach and my PT have been telling me to fix. After the first two intervals went pretty well, I pushed a little harder for the last 3 and was rewarded with slightly increasing speed. This was MUCH better than last week when I slowed down a lot. My intervals were 5:07-5:03 which works out to 5:50-5:45/km. Not fast, but not so awful as it has been, and not too bad for my second speed workout this week. And guess what???? Best of all, NO PAIN!!!!!!!!!!!! :) :) :)

Garmin data here.

Splits:

Split	Time	Avg HR	Max HR	878m	1k equivalent
1	01:40.8	133	151
2	01:43.5	150	151
3	01:42.9	153	156	05:07.2	05:49.9
4	02:00.1	115	156
5	01:39.4	139	154
6	01:44.1	155	157
7	01:42.1	157	160	05:05.6	05:48.1
8	02:00.2	128	160
9	01:40.8	140	155
10	01:42.3	157	160
11	01:42.1	160	162	05:05.2	05:47.6
12	02:00.4	126	162
13	01:39.9	144	157
14	01:42.5	159	161
15	01:41.2	163	165	05:03.6	05:45.8
16	02:00.4	131	165
17	01:40.4	143	161
18	01:43.1	160	162
19	01:40.3	163	166	05:03.8	05:46.0
20	02:46.4	124	166
Summary	36:12.7	143	166
					28:57.4	(5K equivalent)

12K

Yesterday: elliptical and PT. Got new eccentric hamstring exercises. Yay! Hammies are a little sore today but feeling ok.

Today: Coach said 12-15km. It was a very wet morning. Very, very wet. We're in a desert here, so we are a bunch of rain wimps. It started off raining lightly but soon became moderate, steady, soaking rain. Oh yay. It kept that up for my entire workout. When I turned around at 6k (reasoning that I could do 3k more when I got back to the car if I felt OK) the rain was in my face. Yay. I had forgotten my baseball cap and my waterproof jacket, so I was pretty miserable. My injured hamstring started to complain a bit at about 6km, and I double-checked my technique. It never hurt more than 2/10 and was mostly 1-2, but it was still a bit annoying, and between that and the rain, and the fact that I was a bit late (and had to get to work for a bit), I decided 12km would be enough today.

Total time: 1:18:58 for 6:35/km with ave HR 148.

15K national championships

As you might expect, given my lack of conditioning, I was slow. But I didn't think I'd be *THIS* slow. I figured I could at least manage 6:25/km. Nope. About 8km in I was hurting, and slow, and chafing, and I started to cry when Karen S (>60yo, very fast, but still...much older than me) passed me...and I couldn't see Marianne M (>65yo, also very fast) either. Neither of them has ever beaten me before. I could hardly breathe for a while because I was crying while walking :(. I mean, I should have known, but it was just hard to see how truly awful I've become.

Coach assures me that with speed work more regularly and longer, that in 3-4 months I'll be better. That's a long time. Not good enough to make plans for Perth WMA, so I'm probably not going. Better to save $ for Spain in 2018 and take the family with me, since the kids are learning Spanish in school (dual immersion program).

The nice thing about the 15K was the girlfriends' weekend (though poor Diane was very, very sick and we had to take her to the ER on the way down; she's doing better now and will be OK), getting away and relaxing, seeing RW friends, and best of all, walking a lap with some very good American racewalkers from the past - Curt Clausen and Susan Armenta. That was pretty fun - I even have pics of me with them. If I'd been in shape I could've kept up with them easily and that would've been even more fun, but as it was, I couldn't hold even that pace.

The other good thing? Hammy and foot didn't bother me much; pain at most 1/10.

My time was about 1:38:12. Ughhhhh. I was 7th overall so didn't even get an open medal (they give them for 1-6). I did get first in my age group, but I was the only one...geez.... :(

***

Monday - rest day after the race; drove all the way home. Hammy didn't like that, but after a night's sleep it recovered.

Tuesday - 6K easy with Calvin and the dogs, in ~39:15 (watch was waaaay off the first 500m so this is a guesstimate) for 6:32/km. Not too bad. Nothing hurt much; hammy a little sore at times, but mostly 0-1/10.

Today - elliptical and PT exercises.